Ignorance is bliss. Or is it?
How many times have you tried to convince others and especially yourself that everything is okay just the way it is? That person doesn’t want to talk to me; or I don’t want anything to do with so-and-so.
I have no control, so it is what it is.
But no matter how hard you can try to deny it, it is in some way affecting your life.
Here Are 5 Signs Avoidance Is Indeed Affecting Your Life
1 – Someone asks you about a family member that you don’t speak to and you say things are so much better this way, in fact there is so much more peace now… while at the same time you are slamming your fist down on the table. (Your body language is telling a whole different story- the opposite of peace)
2 – A major holiday is around the corner so naturally people innocently ask you if you are spending time with family. You put a smile on your face and politely change the subject. Inside, you can feel a big knot in your stomach.
3 – There is a special public event going on that you have been looking forward to and when the time arrives, an unexpected visit from a family member you don’t talk to anymore throws you off which turns the event into a disaster because of the distraction.
4 – You get stuck in the middle of two family members who are not speaking. Since you are trying to be the peacekeeper, they end up getting mad at you for what’s going on.
5 – The topic is off limits with your spouse or significant other because they have made it clear that they don’t understand what the big deal is.
Estrangements are never simple.
People mostly seem to get one person’s side of it and don’t get to understand or accept the whole picture.
No family is ever perfect even if it looks that way on the outside. As we grow and change so does the structure of our relationships. Each time there is a slip up, we have an opportunity to grow, a chance to change what we can and not only accept what we can’t but also, change how it makes us FEEL.
You see, if our words are saying one thing and our body language is clearly stating something totally different, we are not being truthful to the one person it matters most, OURSELF.
When is there a problem?
Even though, it may be frustrating to admit how deep of an issue it really is, having this awareness lets you begin to focus on a negative reaction with greater attention. It is this specific knowledge that lets you finally seek out a remedy in order to get to the ‘core’ of the issue instead of the symptoms.
Or… you could insist that the only time you have an issue is when ‘they’ push your buttons, so you insist that it really isn’t a problem. But in reality, just watch your body and see how it reacts to just the thought of this occurring without having the person present.
Now this is ignorance masquerading as bliss. So then what?
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”
-Rumi
Take responsibility for your happiness
Take back your power and recognize that you, and only you, are responsible for living a joyful life. We can try to blame others all we want. However in reality, the way we decide to respond is what is responsible for our happiness.
We may need to accept that they are unable to demonstrate their love for us in a way that is meaningful to us. That is on them, not us.
Strive to see them in a positive light
While this may seem impossible because all we see is their negative side, realize that each of us are living in our own ‘truth’ of belief system and we are all doing the best we can with what we know right now. Their actions are coming from their own deeply rooted belief system. This doesn’t make their actions favorable, however it is key to understanding them.
And for some, it may also mean not having them in our life for reasons of safety. We understand that we can’t change them or their actions.
Eliminate the triggers
These triggers are there for a reason. Our body has remembered a time in the past where we felt unsafe so it has created these reactions to something that feels similar to that memory (even if we don’t clearly remember it, our subconscious mind does) in order to protect us.
We have wounds that have never healed. We may have even had them so long we don’t realize they are there anymore because this pain has deep roots.
Working with an energy healing technique called Emotional Freedom Techniques can help us to remove these triggers so that our body will not have a reaction to these triggers anymore. Isn’t it time to heal?
Contact me to find out how this method can help you with removing the triggers so that your body can be at true peace with the situation.
Can you remember a time when on the outside you told everyone around you that things were better this way when inside you could feel all the stress taking over your body?
We’ve all been there at one time or another. What’s your experience? Please share below.
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